Last night, I got ready for bed, said good night to Chase, and gave Bella the secret motion that I was going to bed. Chase doesn't want the dogs on the bed, which I totally understand because she does shed, but I always try :) The secret motion is a simple little hand motion that signals her to "come on" at her own pace, of course. She usually waits till I get the lights off, alarm set and all tucked in. I leave the door cracked so I can see Chase in the living room and Bella on her dog bed. Then, the smooth attack is on. I see her slowly stand up, get a good long stretch in, yawn, look around and slowly make her way to my room. She's gotten so good at it, most of the time Chase doesn't even notice. Bella is by far the best snuggler ever. She lays in front of me so I can get a good bear hug spoon on her, under the covers, head on pillow. I usually hold her little paw like I'm holding her hand.
But last night, I'm not sure what got into me, but I had a little break down. I started thinking about how much I love my Bella so much, that I don't ever want to lose her. We've had family pets that we've had to put down and of course I was sad, but Bella is going to be a whole different story. I honestly think I'm going to be out of commission for a long period of time. Possibly, some counseling. I've had my little bundle of joy for almost 7 years and apparently the life expectancy for boxers is 9-11 years. (I cant even say that without tearing up) Ive thought about cloning her, but I don't really think it'd be the same. Ive told some clients that I might have her stuffed and put her next to my bedside, but they thought that was just weird...? I don't even know why I started to think about all this, but I just started crying. And not crying where you tear up for a second and get a lump in your throat, I full on cried, in bed, in the dark, spooning Bella. It may sound crazy to some who aren't dog people, but I honestly don't see her as a dog. She's like a little person. She sits like a person, knows how to ask for things she wants, knows how to tell me when she goes outside and even knows when Chase is on his way home and stares out the window. If she wants more food, she puts her paw in her food bowl and drags it over to where ever I am sitting and just stares at me. The girl gets it.
She's even been through 12 moves, all over Dallas and Austin. Through some of my toughest times in life, she was the shoulder I cried on. Sometimes it's kind of nice to have some one to listen, who doesn't talk back. Ive honestly thought about making her my maid of honor in our wedding, just sayin.
So, while I'm in the midst of my emotional melt down, Chase came in and turned on the light. He instantly noticed I was being a crazy, so he came and sat beside us as I explained the drama. Drama, that really had no rhyme or reason. Its not like Bella's even showing any signs of old age. But, he was awesome. He told me all the things he loved about Bella and how she truly is unlike any other pup out there. We talked about how much everyone that meets her loves her to death. We talked about how amazing of a life she has and how much her Grandparents love her and spoil the crap out of her (and how my Father feeds her things shes not supposed to have, like Cheetos, bacon, brauts, cookies and God only knows what else). He stayed with us until I fell asleep and totally calmed me down, without making me realize how incredibly silly I was being :)
I woke up, a few hours later and Bella had all 4's in my back, snoring louder than hell. So I sent her packing. The things I do for her...